After she had the baby she admitted to having been on Methadone, a narcotic that helps drug abusers to work through withdrawals. The baby was born addicted and will be in the hospital for a few weeks.
Well we weren't her chosen couple, but we were #2... so the #1 couple is deciding what they are going to do, but we felt we had to make our decision before we were presented with it, as we knew it would be much harder to make. Plus we'll find out tomorrow and I have
a wedding both tomorrow and Sat and didn't want to be crazy with making this decision.
So after MUCH prayer, we knew that this baby wasn't meant for us. I can't describe how it feels to turn away something that we have wept and prayed and longed for for so long, it's gut wrenching. But it was still the right thing to do. We KNOW in our hearts this baby wasn't
meant for us. And honestly it wasn't just the drugs, every single ounce of this situation felt wrong. And yet we still wanted to say yes.....
Anyways, we're praying that this #1 couple knows with all their heart that he is their son and he will have a beautiful family to take him home.
All that aside, we're eating our sad food tonight, Chinese. We've cried a lot.
20 comments:
(((hugs)))Rachel!!! I have been where you are and it is so hard -- I am glad to hear that you are going with your gut on this one!! so important! there is a baby that is meant just for you and dh, you will know when it is right!
OH WOW, I am sad reading this so I do not even imagine how you feel deciding it. Bless you
You and Joey are the only people who can decide what is right for your family. You HAVE to trust yourselves, each other and of course GOD. If He's telling you that it isn't right, then it simply isn't right. Perhaps He truly means this baby to be with the #3 or #4 couple, there's no way to know. All I do know is that when He sends you the child He has created for you, you will feel it in your soul. Hugs babe. So many hugs.....
Oh Rachel, I am so sorry you have to go through this. I can't imagine-but I'm sure that it was one of the hardest most gut wrenching decisions you've ever had to make.
You have to go with what you and Joey feels is the best decision for you and your family. If God is giving you the gift of knowing what is best for you and your family then you must accept it. Only you two know what is best for you both!
Hugs to you both! I'm praying for you! Stay strong!!
Hugs,
Erin
Thinking of you and praying for you guys.....
wow!! that was a tough one. Hang in there.it is well. I pary God gives you the grace you need to go through this moment
Aww. Hang in there! Only you two KNOW what is best for your family. Many times the hard decision is the right one. I'm sure God has a plan for that little boy. On a positive note, I'm so glad that things have been moving so quickly for you, though. Hopefully your baby will be coming very soon.
I'm praying for you and your husband. You two will know when the baby God chooses for you will come along. You will not have any second guesses.
The BM situation is a tough one. Any of them are when drugs are involved. I would have to say though that our BM did cocaine and our baby seems absolutely perfect. He is actually a little above developmentally at this time.
We did have no hesitation and that's why we feel this was the baby God had chosen for us.
Just be patient and God will complete your family soon.
So sorry you have to go through this, but I'm glad you are feeling through your decision. (((hugs)))
This is a very hard decision to make, but trust that God knows what is right for you guys! The right child that was picked out for you will come, it's just hard waiting!
We turned down a situation before we were matched with our daughter. We just *knew* that it was not the right situation. There were WAY to many ethical flags there and we knew we couldn't go forward with that situation.
After a failed placement, and waiting it was so hard to say no. Here was our chance to be parents. But a year and a half later, being mom to the bee, we KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that we made the right choice.
Gosh I am so sorry that you had to make that decision. But did you educate yourselves on methodone? We know someone that had a baby addicted to it, and she's 2 years old now and completely normal.
But, I'll continue to pray for the perfect match for you guys
I can't imagine how hard that was for you. (((Hugs)))
No words, just hugs and prayers.
You made the right decision! Have you ever seen the episode of Sex and the City where Charlotte and Harry don't get the baby? He says, "That wasn't our baby." You have to take the same thought. This little boy was not your baby. When your baby comes, you'll know it. Love and hugs your way!
Just wanted to pop in and say hi. We are praying for you guys. No matter how difficult the decision was, I'm sure you did the right thing.
Love ya!
God has your plan written....in HIS time He will bless you with the baby you are meant for! :) Praying for you...
How are you doing??
Many prayers going out to you guys. I can about imagine how hard that decision was but you know in your heart that that baby was not meant to be yours and you know that in due time God will bring that perfect child into your lives. Thinking and prayin for you guys.
I am so sorry you've been dealing with this. You have to follow your heart; you're so right and smart to do so. Hang in there, sweetie! Many hugs!
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