So... a few days ago my sister wrote a letter to 'A's baby on her blog (click here) And I decided to email it to 'A'. I hadn't heard from her but today I got an email from her mom. I just wanted to share as it's a beautiful letter.
Rachel,
Rachel,
'A' is asleep right now and hasn't seen it yet. I would just like to apologize again for the heartache that you and your family are going through. Although Sydney is a sweet girl, I still cry every day over the loss of my own daughter's childhood, and wish to God things were different. It tears me up inside so much to know the hardships she has to face now that she has decided to keep the baby. I only hope that she has the strength and courage to continue to pursue her dreams.
'A' is still such a little girl herself that I worry that the uphill battle she has in front of her will become more than she had imagined. She is very good with Sydney, much better than I would have imagined, and we have some of the most wonderful friends that are helping 'A' with the baby. It is so ironic the things I feel these days. If Sydney had gone to you guys, I would have had that grief to deal with, and now that she has stayed, I still feel like I have this grief of the loss of 'A's childhood, either way I lost a baby. Does that make any sense?
I had debated with 'A' for weeks before she gave birth to tell her father, because I felt that out of respect, he should know about the pregnancy. Now I wish I had never told him. I truly feel his comments opened up so many emotions for 'A' that she didn't know what to do. I do know that she truly wants the best for Sydney, and that everything she had said to you last Wednesday was the truth, I just think that her love for the baby and her desire to do what was in the best interest of the baby collided.
She knows that you and Joey would have been amazing parents, better than either of us could have hoped for, and I truly believe that through the years you two would have become very good friends with 'A'. I hope that she chooses to contact you, because I would love to know how you are doing as well. Although we have never met, I will always feel a bond to you and your family. We have been through alot for a bunch of strangers! Please take care, and know that 'A' and I still think of you daily.
D
10 comments:
Ok, I'm at work. I should know better than to log on and read your blog. I'm sitting at my desk with tears in my eyes. Thank you for sharing.
Wow- It is good to know that A has such a supportive mother to help her out though! I feel so sad for her too because she knows what a mess everything is. Hmmmm.
That is a wonderful letter. I'm glad she sent it to you... and although I'm sure its still hard. I hope you feel some sense of grace from this. Best.
I've been following your story and really admire the strength you're showing.
I'm not sure if this was an accident or not, but you appear to have used A's name in the first paragraph. You've been so careful to refer to her as 'A' so I thought point that out just in case.
I know this must have been hard to receive and read. I don't know that I could be as strong as you and Joey have. This letter is just further proof (if your blog is not enough) of how much your big heart and faith has touched so many lives.
I'm praying for you as new doors open.
What a beautiful letter she wrote to you. She sounds like an amazing mother, and it must be a very difficult time for her. The letter your sister wrote was beautiful, I am glad you sent it to A.
Both letters are so sweet, especially the one your sister wrote to Sydney. You have handled this situation with such grace. You're all in my prayers.
Rachel, I have followed your entries during this amazing time and always planned to just read but not comment as I feel I'm not someone you know, I just "know" your sister. But, I have found myself sitting here with tears streaming down my cheeks as what 'D' says is so true, that either way she was going to lose a baby. I can feel her concern for you, her child and her grandchild. She sounds like an amazing woman.
I hope by receiving some contact from her you find some sense in it all...
My very best wishes for the coming weeks, if you want to 'talk' to someone who's done it all...you can contact me...miss knows where I am...
Take care Susan :)
I love how the previous post stated that the letter along with your blog is proof of how you have touched so many lives. At least about 356!! :)
I would imagine that the letter was bitter sweet for you to recieve. It seems you have made an impact on their lives. Hang in there.
I found your blog through the nest. I am so sorry for everything you are going through. I cannot imagine the pain you must be feeling. But the way you write on here, you show that you and your husband are incredibly strong people. I only hope the best for you. You and your husband will be in my prayers.
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