WE are going to Mexico!!

I can't wait.. we're SOOO excited.

Joey has some time off over christmas and we're going Dec 17-22 SIX days in paradise!!

We just booked it tonight and the timing is PERFECt.. the day after he finishes icky exams.. and the end of my wedding season.. clearly reasons to celebrate =). and we got a great deal... so we're super super super super excited.

Now hopefully the next 2 1/2 months will fly by =)

tic tok tic tok

I'm not even sure I spelled that right! But i'm waiting to leave for a wedding. I'm too alert to sleep, I'm too lazy to try to work (and I'll be working 9 hours tonight.. I figure don't need to do more) so I just am sitting here checking my email a hundred times an hour... waiting to leave for the wedding.

I wish Joey was here, better yet I wish he was going with me. I'm excited to have Sarah do it with me, but I'm a tiny bit nervous. I'm sure she is too.. but in the end I'm sure it'll all work out! But since I have to be in the car a total of 2 hours by myself, I wish he could be there to keep me company.

I don't know why I (sort of) talked the bride into having me there till 11:30, it's going to be a long night! It always seems like such a good idea at the time... dumb dumb dumb..

Oh well Hopefully at the end of the night I won't be so stinken miserable though since I paid so stinken much for these shoes that are suppose to be AMAZING. Let's hope Miss is right! =)

My mom is so funny, she wants me to go to a gynocologist about my being sad... hm... something about that just doesn't seem right. I know she loves this doctor, but I would think a pyscologist would be a better option. But what do I know?

WellI guess I don't have much else to say. Even my pup is bored, he's just laying on the floor asleep. I wish I could fall asleep here and there for five minutes. I'd probably feel more refreshed!

Well... back to watching the clock! =)

Why do I feel this way?

Lately I just feel so bad about myself.. my work.. my image.. my life.. everything. And the problem is one minute I'm on top of the world and the next I don't think I could feel lower.

I just lay in bed and think about how bad I feel about myself. I know it's unhealthy, I know it's unGodly.. I know it's selfish, especially with all the hurting people in this world.. but i just hurt inside.

I don't know how to make it go away. Poor Joey, he doesn't know what to do with me, and he's so tired and worn out I honestly don't think he has the energy anyway.

LORD, make me better, make me stronger. Make me love myself the way you intended me to. Hlep me to grow secure, not in my image, or the way I feel about myself but in my relationship with you. You are what will make me stronger... not the jeans that hide my fat, or the working out that will zip my wedding dress all the way up... stupid stupid stupid things... why do I put value in them? Teach me that you are the only way. Logically I know it, but my heart cries differently.

Phew... almost there!!!

Okay, so Friday is my LAST DAY WORKING FULL TIME!! as of Saturday morning if you ask me what my occupation is, I will say "well thanks for asking, I am a wedding videographer" yes I will still have a pewney (sp) little job at the bank with a measley little 15 hours (not even garunteed) each week, but my income will come from my business.. the bank will merely provide money for health insurance!

I seriously can't even believe it, I thought it would take at least a year to get to this point... but with so many weddings, I honestly didn't seem to have a choice... but we just have been praying about it for a long time and the timing couldn't have felt better, and God has TOTALLY just made it happen. *Sigh*

I'm not blind anymore!

I couldn't beleive how bad my eyes were after getting them dilated. I honestly can't imagine how blind people live, they are more brave than I am! I felt paralized for three hours.

one good thing came from the eye doctor, I ordered new glases, they're super cute and I can't wait to get them! 3-5 days. Hopefully I'll have the money to pay for them in 3-5 days!!

I hope it's not super hot this weekend, I don't want to trapse all over elk river after a bride in the 100 degree heat. Thank goodness the church has AC

I have to stop at the store tomorrow and get some stuff to make tuna ring salad for the gtg tomorrow. Jen's gonna think I'm a tuna freak, when we had a lunch together one time I ordered tuna ring salad. But I can't help it, it was so good last night!!

Joey gave me a backrub tonight, what a wonderful hubby!! I suppose I should go and give him a rubbin....

I just love going to the doctor

Well, I don't actually LOVE it, but I really like sleeping in a bit - a whole hour! and going into work late!

If only I could get my pinnacle to cooperate and then I'd be able to get off the computer and go take a shower!

Uh oh, I hear Charlie ringing his bell, better go let him out.

oh and we didn't play any games last night :( Joey had to study some more.....

Huh.. so this is a blog?

Well, I've definitely never done one of these, but here goes!

Today was crazy busy, I barely had a minute to think, but it was a great day because my sister called me to tell me that a couple we met with and were super excited about decided to book with us. Then I got a phone call saying a couple I met with last night were going to book with me. And I had a cancellation from yesterday but she wants to book with me even though she couldn't meet! So I'm satisfied! God never ceases to amaze me. Melissa and I know that this business has just taken off and we can only credit it to God. We have done nothing to make this happen and yet it is happening... and it's happening BIG time!

Then I got off of work and went to the store because I decided today we should have tuna ring salad. Agh, is anything more refreshing on a summer evening than tuna ring salad, corn on the cob and lemonade? I love summer, I never feel more alive!

Joey has his second to last final tomorrow and I'm so proud of him, he's just done so great this year. It hasn't affected him as a husband, or as a housewife (just kidding...sort of) and he's just more and more amazing to me every day. I hope we play 500 tonight! How can I never get tired of playing games?!

I go to talk to Sandi yesterday. It was so fun watching my best friend marry the man of her dreams! I can't beleive how hard it was to not talk to her for a whole week, especially after the biggest day of her life! I can't wait to start working on her video so that I can relive her day!

well, I have so many videos that remain untouched and need to be worked on, so I better end this, but thanks Nate for sharing your blog with me because it inspired me to create one!

Good night dear mind... until next time.